Do my best (deluxe)

beautiful wins

Changing the story only meant you’d forget

All those days we lived after we met

Even though they were pink, I colored them black

Time stopped as the watch flew by my head

Survival doesn’t mean you’ve left the scene

But the actually doesn’t mean anything

I’ve changed enough so I’m ready to fight

It’s a dangerous thing that you’re still on my mind

When you’ve had a bad day, beautiful wins

The sorries and scars are your only friends

If you don’t find tomorrow, is it still a sin?

Even if I die this time, beautiful wins

The words of a survivor disappear with time

They said what you did wasn’t a crime

do my best

it may have taken long for me to grow strong

but to say I never was would be wrong

the mirror doesn’t sting like it used to be

But they’ll never know what it’s like to be me

Gratitude doesn't tell I always meant well

I wrote the words to my own fairytale

Please pick a word to describe what you heard

One day I’ll tell you everything I’ve heard

No one haunts me like my own enemy

Everyday I do my best for my identity

the name stayed the same with all the change

Do you look at me now like I am strange?

All I need to do is believe what’s true

The future no longer depends on you

dramatic

I once told my skin how it was supposed to grow

It was the only way to melt frost bite in the snow

Please raise your glasses for a nice to meet you tost

The heretics on Sunday laugh at the holy ghost

My feelings didn’t change, I just learned how to cope

No one in the world really loves me the most

Will they like who I am? Will they ever come?

I came with a warning that says unpredictable

Why can’t my feelings peak and slow?

Don’t call me dramatic when my response takes control

The pieces move across the board to achieve my goals

I knew at the age of five who owned my soul

People are hungry to watch my grief

The one that I loved but will never meet

trauma bonded

I’d give you the credit if you really meant it

But someone told me your intentions are limited

is that why you scream at me to remedy?

A relationship built on the scars you gave me

No one can blame you if you’re just a kid

No one can tell you to stop in a relationship

It’s like I told my brain we’re trauma bonded

It was me, not you, who allowed my to live

What does it mean that it’s on repeat?

Why can I not sit still in my seat?

The trauma is over but I cannot breathe

The worst part of hell is all of the heat

It makes me sad you took a part of me

When you die, I’ll get it back, you’ll see

the silent keeper

friends are like magic she used to collect

she is the high schools biggest reject

Family didn’t mean all the words that were said

But they don’t talk anymore because of it

If she keeps secrets, is she the one they know?

When they describe who she is, there’s finally hope

She got to know demons and villains and ghosts

The difference between them is explained in her book

She is the silent keeper of all her demons

She swallowed her pride to change with the season

Nobody has ever asked for the reason

So she’s the silent keeper of all her demons

Are you happy to carry it all on your own?

I think it’s not something you’ve outgrown

it will never work

A habit is formed when you mourn the Lord

It’s easy for the warning signs to be ignored

One day you’ll know who you are to my soul

How the industry took away my control

The beginning doesn’t tell you what will come

If you don’t tell me where it came from

The sea carried away that version of me

I hope that maybe it’s something you keep

I swallow the words that it will never work

I’m constantly trying to break the curse

The smiles comes once I’ve treated the burn

What if the doctors never find a cure?

The finish line is so close to mine

I think it may be all in my mind

cut me open

I used to look for signs that I was dying

The pain kept me close as long as I was fighting

Dictionaries don’t define my sickest lies

The emergency room visits blame my mind

The tears never stained my ability to try

When I get high, I couldn’t tell you why

Does my mind tell a story you want to hide?

Because I can see the look in your eyes

If you cut me open, you’ll find my rotting organs

They were labeled foreign when they were imported

The side effects hurt but the doctors define its worth

Is this the payment for my existence? did you see the birth?

I bleed the reason for my demons

I hope God won’t break our agreement

turn around

pictures were the description of what I was given

I know in my heart you do this to women

You only get one call when you’re in prison

I never had somebody that would listen

Why do I care? How’d it go? Are you sure?

The pain is what made me mature

I’m friends with my shadow but I always look

I know the diagnosis but I never understood

I always turn around to see your face in the crowd

You would think that a villain stands out

You’re marked by hatred nobody knows about

The years mean nothing when my brain says it counts

Get used to the days of what they all say

I am the person that I needed to stay