grown woman (deluxe)

grown woman

children dream about the life they’re told to be

they don’t see what only the blind would agree

the company you keep can take your destiny

you have to earn your right to be able to sleep

happiness has limits and counts the minutes

I only have peace when the spirits visit

A true imposter knows they’ll never be yours

But no one knows the pain they had to endure

all the drawings on the wall are a timeline

boxes are only packed when the times right

certain things happen when you don’t sign

I’m a grown woman and I’m doing just fine

Even if you don’t agree

Take your ass to therapy

overstimulated

she learned to run when she saw the sun

while everyone screamed it was really fun

drinking the juice meant she could be loose

that was before she promised not to use

the gossip doesn’t explain what she’d like to say

would anyone still remember it today?

Only the guilt can listen to her written fiction

You have no idea what it’s like with this condition

I think that I have hit my limit

I am probably overstimulated

I know it’s only been a minute

But I need to return my ticket

Does every word count to the exact amount?

She never really says what it’s truly about

you’re the problem

when the mean girls have fun, the next girl is the one

no one is safe until the loud one says they’re done

it turns apologies into your worst qualities

they knew what to do like they read psychology

and that day I learned not to sit back with no words

because you’ll probably be next to leave the herd

my anger can’t control something I don’t know

and I don’t care that it was so long ago

greetings to the one and only

I learn more when I’m lonely

Let me say this really slowly

You’re the problem, honey

If hates not good for your soul,

I am going to die alone

mrs. soldier

the draft didn’t count the ones that stuck around

they only took notice when their bodies were found

she once loved a boy she made care packages for

until she realized she needed to fight in the war

her uniform was made with threads of afraid

that’s the reason her mother started to pray

in the end, she didn’t die by another’s hand

but she never made it back to the holy land

dear mrs. soldier, why do you look so much older?

there are so many stories that she never told her

only cause it rhymes, is this what it’s like to bipolar?

no one stayed cause they knew her winters are colder

maybe one day that boy will behave

but as of now, she hasn’t been saved

my very first heartbreak

the text message said my guilt should be checked

after all these years, is it something you kept?

It’s like all of our parties you won’t attend

Why is it so hard to turn on your only friend?

Especially when adults have a different pulse

Why count the ages without the results?

No matter the truth, I will never hate you

But would you ever write it in a tattoo?

your mistake was my very first heartbreak

but that really wasn’t your decision to make

I bought one because you’re afraid of snakes

A grin tells a lie when eating wedding cake

A kiss isn’t something you need to miss

Maybe it’ll happen when you finally quit

fight for breath

it takes time for your eyes to adjust to the lights

everyone’s watching and there’s nowhere to hide

the pain in my chest tells me all that I left

so, I write these stories as a way to express

I finally learned that to pretend can extend

Life can be a party that you’ll actually attend

The heat of my dreams kept it all next to me

But something is wrong with the way I breathe

a fighter still wins even in death

this life makes me fight for breath

an alibi depends on who you’re with

and life’s bills are due on the tenth

I always wondered if I would recover

You just get used to the new colors

feel better

if things aren’t the same, there’s lightning in my brain

I always set my own standards that I’ll never maintain

The breath only came when I blew out the flame

Maybe I signed up for this under a different name

I think what I need to see is who I turn out to be

But a focus on the future comes with a fee

Life doesn’t tell you when it’s a guarantee

Maybe one day I’ll actually agree

I did something that makes me forget her

So, I wrote myself a letter to feel better

Is it possible to be perfect forever and ever?

I’ve changed in ways only God can measure

The face in the picture makes me miss her

I framed a new one like she never existed