drugs and psychosis
There is no denying that drugs can play a part in psychosis, but this does not happen with every person that uses drugs. Certain drugs increase the activity of brain chemicals like dopamine that are involved in psychosis. Psychosis causes hallucinations, delusions, disorganized speaking, and difficulty establishing reality. The drugs that reportedly cause psychosis are stimulants, cannabis, hallucinogens, and dissociative drugs. Other risk factors are a personal or family history of psychotic disorders, the use of drugs at a young age, frequent and high-dosage use, using multiple substances, and sleep deprivation. Daily cannabis users are 3-5 times more likely to go into psychosis, 25-40% of meth users experience psychotic symptoms, and 30-60% of cocaine users experience psychotic symptoms. Basically, there is a link, and it is a problem.
My story is not unique. It actually happens to so many people. I started abusing amphetamines when I was a senior in college. I decided I wanted to get serious about to school and I got diagnosed with ADHD by my doctor (my first mental health diagnosis). The feeling it gave me was so intense that I genuinely believe I was hooked right away. But for a long time, I took my daily dose and didn’t abuse it. Of course, this meant no psychosis. It wasn’t until the self-described dosage went up and up. At the time, I didn’t have a bipolar diagnosis, and I think it’s important to say that drugs don’t cause mental health conditions, but it can trigger it early, worsen the disorder, or trigger an episode. This all depends on the drug, the dose, how often it was used, age, and genetic or psychological vulnerability.
When I was hospitalized, I would lie to the doctor about my stimulant use even when they flat out asked me if I was abusing it. Deep down, I didn’t want my psychosis because to be drug-induced because that meant it was my fault. When I did finally tell someone, the doctor said that I had likely been overdosing on amphetamines and with the dose I was taking, it was basically like doing meth. There are two types of psychosis- temporary and persistent. Temporary psychosis improves after the drug is gone and persistent psychosis is when drugs trigger an underlying psychotic disorder that have lasting effects. I definitely had persistent psychosis, and it lasted for roughly five years.
I had hallucinations where I would see faces, shadows, strange videos, and bible scenes. I also had voices telling me what to do. I was paranoid, and I had delusions around the FBI, CIA, the illuminati, and so much more. I wasn’t sleeping. My family noticed that our conversations made no sense, and I needed anti-psychotics to come out of it. But it still lasted for a really long time. Honestly, I didn’t want to come out of psychosis. I had imaginary friends and a grand idea that I had a special path. I clung to it like it wasn’t delusional, but I can honestly say now- THANK GOD.
Drugs cause your thoughts to become a reality. It forces you to live with a brain that is constantly looking for threats. In my case, I thought taking more drugs would help, but all it did was push me farther and farther into psychosis. It’s an almost impossible cycle to get out of but it is possible. Now, I don’t do any drugs. I can’t. And I can finally admit that drugs did play a part in my psychosis.
xoxo
